But it Takes 2 to Tango?

So I should take some responsibility? What I have done is remain visible at times to demonstrate that I live + breathe and am going nowhere, and I have a right not to be overridden via someone's fantasies, however pervasive.

I have stood by as the 'lady' in question has surrounded herself, sometimes not with ease, with folks who think she's the bee's knees, or those in need of help who have found somewhere congenial. I don't question that she has skills that would help in some situations. I feel there are problem areas, not just my own concerns, but that generally opening one's home to people in trouble is more risky than say 20 years ago.

If a counsellor or therapist bites off more than they can chew, or some things crack off or combine, there can be the kind of trouble that made more than one good-intentioned helper shut up shop and head for the hills. If the helper is not well-intentioned or boundaried, or is seeking too much kudos, even more so.

The play-acting I've been viewing and subjected to does not bode well for some people going through difficulties, feeling they may have been short-changed by someone who should not get close to doing that with anyone who may be presently vulnerable. I have concerns over her safety - believe it or not (and my own), from possible spin-offs or unintended consequences through someone trying to mix 'n' match too many things in one small place at one time.

That's as maybe and is obviously my opinion. The only thing I am guilty of is standing up for myself, albeit ever so slightly. You think that warrants this situation? I cannot give more specifics in case it reveals too much. But the last few weeks there have been glances from passers-by at the upstairs to both houses, a carload of lads outside offering an unrequired, unlikely explanation before racing off, and people peering through the fence. All is unprecedented (I had a weather eye open), and is due to nothing I've been up to.

My thinking returns to:

1) Usually in situations that have grown awkward, people settle back into a more strategic and comfortable routine, with Hi, how are you? and something about the weather.

2) Are there strategic reasons behind the behaviours I am faced with, which seem increasingly concerted? Do we all play out our roles instinctively, or much more strategically, or a bit of both?  What happens if we meet ourselves coming backwards, when something we do is inconsistent or maybe we'd be shooting ourselves in the foot? Sure, we need to adapt at times, and often people do gain insight and make changes.

3) I am not sure why the female in question appears to have changed significantly. I guess we all behave differently at various times in life, and in different situations. I tend to appear pretty anaemic, as though I can't stand up and fight. Even when distraught, I give back what I get. That message has got across, and probably explains this pantomime reaching Act III. Is all life a strategic game? Maybe one day we'll find out. Meanwhile I continue to fight for those who cannot fight for themselves because of their own tragedies or circumstances. A so-called counsellor making anyone's life harder is something I really cannot countenance.

4) Do the couple eye this property as a future acquisition for empire building, and I am currently in situ? That may sound daft, but it happened when someone wanted to buy my mother's flat. They'd been neighbours of hers, and decent both to her and me, not antagonistic. One would expect this female counsellor to court co-operation rather than the very opposite. It seems every small way I assert myself over anything-at-all is red rag to a bull and treated as major, though I have kept a very low profile. I refuse to be virtually painted into a corner, as some older residents find happens, often with their being blamed rather than the other way around.

5) I've grown tired of being a stand-in floor show for a couple with nowhere interesting to turn their gaze. Ordinary work situations have other events and people, and so the focus tends to wane unless someone stirs the pot. Here there is no-one else to even notice or be affected by their antics, showing off, or whispering their way down the path in my line of sight, something I have changed in the hope it extinguishes their behaviour. Sadly no other commonsense approach has improved things, which in itself is a cause for query. I have not stirred any pot, simply stood my ground.

6) There is some paranoia here, and anyone is welcome to wave a finger in my direction. Hey, you won't be the only one. I do not feel I am the only one either. What scares me most is people speaking with forked tongue and brittle smile. Now there is much traipsing along the side fence to this property as if she's pulled off a coup, and grimacing at our windows. It is my only private place. Why start this after several years? Whose obsession is it? I never experienced anything like this except in a hostile workplace where some people wish you succumbed to something horrid overnight! I am not everyone's favourite person, but can you say this un-neighbour's behaviour is ordinary? I make light of it here, but it is upsetting day in, day out.

7) Instead of the phenomenon easing up or getting clearer, 'it' has worsened despite my efforts to absent myself physically much of the time, and psychologically all the time. Since it began, her partner has hardly been left on his own without her a foot away. When I did bump into him, he chattered like he always used to - limited but ordinary - while she hovered in the doorway. I believe this has been part of some strategy of control largely nothing to do with me, but which grew to involve me: there's no-one else around. There have been big changes 2 days on from the last chat, and hopefully this silly saga will soon be done with.

8) Time and time again, I wonder if something or someone else, is at back of this situation, as if it were part of a confidence trick. It seems to be like a fit-up, only part of which came off. And I am bearing the brunt of the wider failure.

9) Could it be part of some obscure cult-like growth or political scheme, where Mata Hari's are placed into sensitive relationships or locations! But I digress...

If a phrase or paragraph or just a crucial word, clues you in on something to follow up, or to work out how to get by and protect yourself, my job is done.

Good Luck.

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